I suppose I would be considered beyond redemption if I were to admit to having a matching soap dish and toilet roll holder.

This one is called:

Un hombre abandonado, despreciado, y lleno de cicatrices, lucho hasta su ultima onza de valentia por la paz y la justicia entre los hombres.

The sculptor is A. Teno and the work can be found in calle Málaga, Nerja.

In presenting his running mate, Barack Obama introduced Biden as ‘the next President’….Oops, not a good start.

Biden, on the other hand, referred to his new ally as ‘Barack America’, having to be corrected by the audience!…

Oh dear, what is the world in for if these two get elected?

Cyclist Chris Hoy has become a triple gold medalist, the first Briton to achieve that feat since swimmer Henry Taylor back in 1908 in London. Knighthood on the horizon?

As for Michael Phelps, well, what can you say? Eight gold medals, loads of world records. It probably helped that the games were held in China, of course. Get one gold medal and a couple of hours later you want another.

Don’t know what it is about Chinese food. The Chinese I come into contact with at the moment all seem to be ravenous at roughly two hour intervals, and not just for a snack or a tapa but for a huge meal. Funny how certain images just pop into your mind.

All sports have their own individual championships, some, like boxing, have almost as many championships as they do boxers, but the ‘big one’ is always the Olympics, something a bit special.

There are the ‘regular’ Olympics, as it were, the Paralympics and, of course, the elitist offshoots such as the Gay Olympics. So, everyone gets to show off their prowess in their chosen sport.

Well, they don’t actually. There is one group who suffer blatant discrimination when it comes to participation in Olympic sport, or any sport for that matter, and in this day and age, when everyone seems to be bending over backwards to appease minorities and positive discrimination is the order of the day, it is absolutely outrageous that they continue to be overlooked.

What we need, in order to redress the balance, are the SterOlympics, a showcase for supermen and women (and the in-betweenies judging by some of the side effects) to show us what they can really do.

If a Vietnamese athlete can enhance her performance to achieve an overall 59th place in the gymnastics, just imagine what someone of the calibre of a Bolt or a Phelps could achieve! What a spectacle it would be.

It would be a team competition, but not on the basis of nationality, rather on the substance(s) being used. This would also give us the chance to see which drugs are the best and for which sport. There would be Team EPO, Team Nandrolone, Team Methyltrienolone - although I think they might have to change their name to make it more catchy for the public, The Mets maybe - Team Cocktail A etc.

All athletes, not just a random sample, would be tested prior to competition and anyone testing negative would be immediately sent home in disgrace.

It’s about time we ended the discrimination…

Other magazines, such as Playboy, are already very much web oriented and one imagines that Playgirl will assume a similar sort of format with more pictures and videos and less editorial comment.

WANTED : Customers. No experience required, Must have cash. Glass provided. Enquire within.

The cleaning boat was pottering around Calahonda beach collecting all the rubbish that people decided to chuck in the sea. Comes in pretty close to shore, within about 10 to 15 metres. Looks more like it should be chugging down the Amazon or the Nile.

Suppose it couldn’t go any further out, might get torpedoed!

The old parathingy boat was also busy.

Everywhere is different, of course, it’s what makes life interesting. What would be classed as discrimination in one country is a culture in another.

‘Live’ music everyday except Monday’s in the Papagayo bar/restaurant during the summer. Starts around 22:30 and is quite varied. One day a DJ, another day flamenco, another day rock.

Carabeo 34 now has a flamenco guitarist every Wednesday and Sunday….

It looks like ETA was planning a summer bombing campaign in Andalucía until the comando Vizcaya was broken up in the past few days. It always used to be the case that the coast could expect some sort of bombing campaign every summer, it was almost traditional.

I recall that two or three years ago, a bar down the coast, Torremolinos I believe although wouldn’t swear to it, changed hands after umpteen years with the same owner. The new people decided to totally renovate the whole place. When it came to taking out the ceiling, they discovered an unexploded bomb dating back to the 1970’s and the height of ETA’s bomb attacks along the coast.

The only thing that had prevented the device going off was a dicky timer! All those years, all those customers!

Just imagine for one moment that the Basques gain independence from Madrid and Spain, become an independent nation. What is likely to be the first thing this new country does?

Apply to join the EU and be governed by Brussels!!!

Guns are part of American culture, the right to bear arms even being part of the Constitution. Shootings happen all the time and are almost an accepted part of everyday life. Shoot an intruder, no problem. But whack your lawnmower and you’re in big trouble.

Keith Walendowski, from Milwaukee, got rather upset when his lawnmower wouldn’t start. So he grabbed his gun and shot it. He is now under arrest for disorderly conduct and possession of a sawn-off shotgun. He could face a fine of up to $11,000 and a maximum prison sentence of six-and-a-half years if convicted.

Mr Walendowski, who had apparently been partaking of alcoholic beverages at the time, told police that it was his lawnmower, in his own back yard and he could shoot it if he wanted. The police begged to differ.

The best part of the episode, though, relates to statements apparently made by a couple of people after the event. A local retailer is quoted as saying that Mr Walendowski ‘might now have difficulty getting his lawn mower repaired’. Really?

And the manager of Wagner’s Garden Mart came out with, “Anything not factory recommended would void the warranty.” Was there even the remotest chance that a factory might have recommended assassinating a non-cooperative machine?…Only in America.

Last night was the first time I have ever heard a bar owner openly describe business, and bear in mind it’s the end of July and the season is in full swing, as a ‘disaster’. He is even contemplating closing up and going away for a week or so.

Some are still putting on brave faces, even though their establishments are empty more often than is healthy, but there are a lot who are really struggling at the moment.

Restaurant/bar Zayas is not only up for sale (since yesterday) but has, unusually, just shut up shop altogether….