Positive thinking…

HH. ‘Good morning Ms Harperson,…..Harriet’.

PM. ‘Good morning Prime Minister, or may I call you…’

PM. ‘Prime?’

HH. ‘I was thinking more along the lines of Gordon, actually.’

PM. ‘Oh…Not what most people call me these days, but why not. Quite novel. Anyway, I’ve called you in today for two reasons.’

HH. ‘And they are, Gordy?’

PM. ‘Firstly, to commend you and your team at the Ministry for Silly Policies for its splendid work. Particularly your new bill for positive discrimination. Brilliant work, Harriet. Well done!’

HH. ‘Why, thank you Gord.’

PM. ‘And secondly, myself and the entire Cabinet would like to wish you every success in your new career, whatever that may be.’

HH. ‘But…I mean…I’m to be replaced?’

PM. ‘In a nutshell, yes. Don’t worry, we’ve found the perfect replacement, you’ll be proud.’

HH. ‘Someone with a brain?’.

PM. ‘Very droll, Harriet, very droll. See you haven’t lost your sense of humour. No, no, no, we could never have one of those in the Cabinet, as you well know.’

HH. ‘Then who is it, if I may ask?’

PM. ‘You certainly may. And as I said, you’ll be dead chuffed, I know. The new Minister for Silly Policies, and we were so lucky to find her, is a vertically challenged illiterate gay lesbian cross-dressing transvestite black Jewish single mother from a hitherto unknown Amazon tribe.’

HH. ‘But it’s so unfair after all the hard work I’ve put in over the years.’

PM. ‘Sad but true. But we can’t stand in the way of progress, now can we?’

HH. ‘I shall be appealing’.

PM. ‘I’ve always found you to be so, but I’m afraid that will be out of the question’

HH. ‘Why’?

PM. ‘ It’s obvious, you are a member of the indiginous population of this country and, as such, no longer have any rights whatsoever’.

HH. ‘Of course, I’d forgotten….Silly me….’

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